F(l/r)ee America, Look Cute! It’s the 4th of July!

I filtered the J. Crew Vacation Shop through my maximalist lens so you can focus on stunting this holiday weekend.

Inspired by my trip to Masseria San Domenico with the J Crew-crew, I hit the site’s summer shop to prune and perfect my heaving summer cart! You’re welcome!

Surprise!

I moved…

…To Paris…

…For the summer… and maybe longer. (TBD, I’m still trying on expat energy and need to establish whether I can be fun, flirty, and free while starting over in a new city, or… you know… not.)

As I open the windows of my tiny fourth-floor walkup apartment on Île Saint-Louis to the symphonic sounds of a garbage truck collecting what I can only imagine is 100,000 wine bottles, I am struck by a single, deliriously freeing realization: that I, a Parisienne, now possess the absolute privilege of forgetting it is the Fourth of July.

And Honestly? That Feels Patriotic.

I wish this was because I have begun to unlearn the deeply American instinct to tether celebration to nationalism, but it’s more likely due to heatstroke and copious soft cheese consumption.

Every time this holiday rolls around, I feel a little allergic to it. Listen, I love a charred hot dog as much as the rest of them, and I will take just about any excuse to wear red gingham—but I’m just not into the rituals that masquerade as freedom while so many people don’t get to be or even feel free. What better way to celebrate “independence” than by actually embodying it? Which is why I try to escape America every chance I get. Not forever. But often.

I am happy to report that life is… better… over here. The tomatoes taste like something. The eggs are organic and four US dollars. And, the air conditioning is non-existent (wait, that part is kind of bad). Everything is simpler, except, of course, the complex geometry of fitting my exploding suitcases into my 14” closet which came stocked with exactly 6 hangers. Is this how most people vacation?! Simply couldn’t be me…

Let’s get something straight: I am not a capsule wardrobe girlie. I do not believe in packing light. I believe in outfit changes, statement earrings, headscarves conscientiously clashing with my caftans, mumus, miniskirts, and micro shorts.

Because I am benevolent, and recognize my strategy of “overstuff your carry-on and try to sneak two into the cabin” is not for everyone (or really anyone of sound and healthy mind), I have found a way to streamline my indulgent, over-the-top vacation aesthetic without sacrificing the haphazard methodology that brings all the drama. Because J.Crew–who made this post (and vacation) possible— that totem of classic Americana– is feeling a little more… dare I say… euro. She (assuming that the fictional J. stands for Jennifer) is no longer just your go-to preppy catalogue comfort zone — she’s now a little more weird, a little more maxi, and a one-stop-shop for summer sartorialists, like myself. And thank whatever god you pray to for that! Or, alternatively, Olympia Gayot.

So, in celebration of independence, consider this is your official invitation to opt out of the performative patriotism and opt into my moodboard. Let this bonus letter for the week liberate you from essentialist vacation wardrobing.

Without further ado, I present to you:

GKJ’S Maximalist’s Edit and Styling Guide to J.Crew Summer Baddie-ism

Randomly both Tilda in “The Beach” AND Gwyn in “The Talented Mr. Ripley”

Beveled oval sunglasses, $80.99; 2.) 1993 underwire bikini top in retro daisy print, $87.99; 3.) Beaded nautical charm necklace, $69.50 & Mixed-stone necklace,$87.99; 4.) Knee-length skirt in sunset rose block print, $89.50; 5.) Paros open-weave bag in straw, $68.50; 6.) Krista slingback kitten-heel sandals in leather, $150.99.

I’m always going to advocate for a bikini top as outerwear, especially when that means seamless transitions between sea and a spritz-filled lunch. These prints are chaotic together but find harmony in the yellows and floral motif. I actually just added this one to my cart. There’s a sort of Italian sophistication here but also the fun Bali baddie energy. A delicate balance and important cross section.

Very Vagabond in a Way that is Most Pleasing to Me

1.) Bungalow cat-eye sunglasses, $89.50; 2.) Perfect string bikini top, $71.99 & Button-trim bandeau bikini top, $87.99; 3.) Mixed-bead necklace, $69.50 & Alighieri X J.Crew high seas necklace, $428.00; 4. '90s no-tie string bikini bottom, $71.99; Cotton sarong in prints, $59.50; 6.) Boat shoes in leather, $179.99

You need a pair of closed toed shoes on vacation. It doesn’t matter how hot it is or how sandy— you need a reprieve from your toes, and so does everyone around you. The shoe game on the site is pretty crazy right now, and I love this little two-tonal loafer. Boat shoes are always fab but this color-way is special. The classicism of the style made me want to lean into polka dots in the ‘kini. Topped it all off with some eclectic additions– a cat eye! A sarong! Beady jingle jangles! A recipe for playfulness (but not at the expense of chicness). Exquisite.

An Illusion of Calm

1.) Raffia starfish statement earrings, $46.50; 2.) Collection sequin-embellished bra top, $71.99; 3.) Garçon classic shirt in Baird McNutt Irish linen, $98.00; 4.) New Gwyneth slip skirt in linen, $79.99; 5.)Nautical lemon charm necklace, $58.50 & Beaded leather cord necklace, $69.50 & Freshwater pearl necklace, $69.50; 6.) Oversized printed silk bandana, $69.50; 7.) Wide thong sandals in leather, $123.99.

I’m a simp for a big ass earring and I dig a natural fiber, so this look actually started with these major starfish earrings. I wanted serene/seaside. Hamptonian but in the “out east” Nancy Meyer way. Martha’s Vineyard coastal Black auntie with a few loose screws. I needed linen. And nothing says main character energy like an almost-matching two piece set. Imagine the shirt open and the sleeves rolled then pushed as far up as possible on the arm– creating more of a strong shouldered silhouette. The scarf is tied like a babushka around the head. We have established that the combo of yellow and blue has me in an absolute chokehold so overall this look gets a 10 outta 10 from GKJ!

Clothes are Sometimes Necessary

1.)Piqué cropped polo shirt in stripe, $71.99; 2.) Freshwater pearl and bead drop earrings, $35.99; 3.) Bungalow wire-frame sunglasses, $65.99; 4.) Small hand-knotted crochet bag with beads, $118.00; 5.) Stratus embellished short in tonal tulip block print; $89.50; 6.) Krista slingback kitten-heel sandals in leather, $150.99

Because I exclusively vacation in warm locales (winter sports/snow holiday people really disturb me), sweating is a major feature of my trips. If I'm doing any sort of walking that extends beyond going from bathing in a body of water to the bar, I’m going to need chafing protection. It’s time to bring in a short. This one is embellished with beading and sequins and is almostttt dirt-bag™ length which is, of course, my favorite length! I’d tie up this already cropped polo to get full midriff exposure and, of course, suffer through a little heel. Bliss.

There is so much more on the site, I just actually fear my credit card bill if I don’t put my trigger fingers down.

I could do this all day, but I believe there was some mention of a holiday so, instead, I’ll heed my own advice, throw on something wacky and sip some champagne by seine.

Can’t believe the Polyvore kid in me who spent hours making mood boards has finally found a way to turn it into a job! Momma, we made it!

Ciao for now.